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Monday, March 5, 2012

HE IS


Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!
Bec here. The Lord reminded me of this song the other day, and I can’t get it off my mind, so I thought I’d share.
“Father, let the world just fade away
Let me feel your presence in this place
Lord, I’ve never been so weary
How I need to know you’re near me
Father, let the world just fade away
Till I’m on my knees
Till my heart can sing
He is
He was
He always will be
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
He is
Father, let your Holy Spirit sing
Let him calm the storm inside of me
As I stand amazed
Lift my hands and say
He is
He was
He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Through every fear
And every doubt
And every tear I shed
Down every road
I’m not alone
No matter where I am
He is
He was
And He always will be
He lives
He loves
He’s always with me
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Be still, and know
Be still, my soul
He is”
Mark Schultz – “He Is
Of course, this song also reminds me of the precious hymn “Be Still, My Soul” by Katharina A. von Schlegel.
Just the week before we learned that our Glorietta had gone Home before us, I was talking with a friend at the crisis pregnancy center where I volunteer. She had asked about our son Ezekiel, who happens to be a large part of the reason why I am there, and I shared with her how God gave us Gianna just 3 months after our loss of Zeke, and after 3 years of trying for him. During the last half of my pregnancy with Gianna, the god of fear and I had all-out war, and in that time the Words that came to my heart’s aid more than any other were “Be still, and KNOW.”
The week prior to the conversation with my fellow volunteer, Scott and I had landed at the doc’s office out of fear that something was wrong with our baby. As far as we know, there wasn't at that point. She looked perfect and even had a wave for Mommy; but for me, the hours leading up to that appointment were filled with battle cries. What’s wrong with me, Lord? Why can’t I just trust you? We’ve fought this battle and won, right? On and on my thoughts raged.
Be still, and know. . . .
I can’t, Father. I can’t do this again. I need to know what you’re doing.
I am the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. . . .be still.
[deep breath] Okay, help me be still. Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!
Fast forward 2 weeks to when my faith was absolutely shaken to its core as I held my lifeless sweet baby girl.
What are you doing, Father?!
Remember, Bec, I AM. Be still.
That’s crazy! I want to believe, but I’m not sure I can anymore. Help me!
He has. And He will.
There are numerous Scriptures and songs that our Comforter has brought to mind to salve my broken, bleeding heart, but I’m not able to share them all with you. The verses above are poignant for me because no matter how much my heart—at times—wants to run and hide, the great I AM THAT I AM of Exodus is the same great I AM of today. He simply *IS*. He is our one constant in this life—never changing, never lying, never hateful, never capricious, never vindictive, and so on. He is absolutely good and completely worthy of trust—mine and yours. Let come what may. He has proven Himself above and beyond what He should need to, but He’s patient and gentle enough to persevere until we simple jars of clay finally get it.
Be still. He is.